The Next Few Weeks
by ForrestLupin
Summary: Kurt returns to McKinley. Life catches up with him there. He deals with his feelings about Blaine, his Mother, and life. A Kurt story more than any ship, though there will be plenty of Klaine and other ships. Please review! I live for them!
1. Chapter 1: Goodbye Love

**Chapter 1: Goodbye Love**

**Sunday**

Kurt's mind had been made up for days. All it took was the Rachel's kiss on Blaine's lips to really set him in what he knew had to be. Blaine was going to have to be pushed out of his mind. There couldn't be anything between them, even if Blaine was as gay as he assured Kurt he was. Kurt had tried to pretend that he was someone he wasn't once, and there was no room in his life for someone that could be so stupidly oblivious to Kurt's feelings that he'd kiss his new found best friend. Kurt didn't blame Rachel. He couldn't blame Rachel. _She_ was his friend.

Things had gotten awkward at Dalton since the Blaine/Rachel affair, and it was that feeling that brought Kurt to his current conversation with Blaine. The older boy was sitting across from Kurt at the coffee shop, sipping his coffee in silence. Kurt had told him that there was something extremely important that he needed to talk to him about, and Blaine unquestioningly followed him to the cafe. Kurt's eyes couldn't meet Blaine's and the older boy's eyes.

Blaine spoke first.

"Kurt, what's up? There's been a wall up around you the last few days. It's like you shut down every time you're around me. There's something wrong, I know it. You may as well just tell me now, it'll hurt less the sooner your get it out."

Kurt looked down at his hands and gathered his willpower. He forced himself to look into those gorgeous eyes. They didn't hold the same deep longing that they had for him before, but there was such openness, such love contained in them. It made it almost physically painful for the words to escape his mouth.

"Blaine, ever since you and Rachel-"

"Kurt, that didn't mean anything. It was stupid for me to even doubt myself for a moment. She's talented, and pretty. That's all. It's not like I'm in love with her. Besides, I think she's gayer than I am."

"Rachel? Well...Maybe. I dunno. I doubt it. But that's not the point. The point is, you made me realize that there's an invisible line in my head that can't be crossed in order to maintain a relationship with someone."

Blaine's demenor changed to defiant. Kurt had struck a chord that Blaine didn't feel like dealing with. It was confusing, and so many feelings were wrapped up into the idea of Kurt and Blaine's relationship potential that Blaine pushed them all down. Anger replaced what could have been a completely different emotion, in another time, on another day.

"We're not even in a relationship Kurt. Seriously, if you're going to start acting like we're together-"

"Blaine, don't be an idiot. We're friends. That's a relationship too. And your stunt with Rachel made me realize that whatever we could have had, or whatever we had or have, it can't be. There was a bubble that we existed in, and you burst it the moment yours and Rachel's lips touched. It's something I can't let go, and it's not your fault. It's a personal line that you couldn't have known about. I didn't even know about it."

"So our friendship is going to be over because I needed an event in my life to reassure me of the choices I've made? I hope you know how stupid this makes you sound, Kurt. Not to mention selfish. It's not like I went out of my way to do anything to hurt you. I care about you, Kurt. You're important to me. I don't want to lose you."

"Blaine. I've thought so much about this. I've thought about how much I'll miss you. I've thought about how much _you _mean to _me._ But. Whenever I think about how we were before. How I always hung on your every word, how I was so afraid to lose you. Especially when Valentine's Day rolled around. You meant too much to me for too long. Then, when you kissed Rachel...Something changed. I don't know how to explain it. I just don't feel like I'm talking to the same person anymore."

"I haven't changed, Kurt. I'm still me. Whoever I am."

"Well, then it's me that's changed, Blaine. I don't know if I'm changed for the better, but I'm changed for good. This isn't something that I can change."

Blaine looked at the Formica tabletop and rubbed at the side of his coffee cup. This conversation wasn't one he ever thought he'd be having. Kurt didn't want to be around him anymore. Then the thought occurred to him.

"You said you'd miss me, Kurt. Where are you going? You have to see me every day at Warbler's practice anyway. How is this going to work?"

"Blaine. I've thought it over a lot. I didn't know what to do. I talked to Jeff a lot about it. He wasn't happy about what I came up with, but he agreed with me that it was probably the right decision. I talked to the Dean, and I'm getting a partial refund on my Dalton tuition. It's not the whole thing, but I haven't been here long enough to take too much of it away. My dad will get a honeymoon now, and I'm going back to McKinley. This is going to be my last week here. I sent a letter to the Ohio State Show Choir Board, and they gave me approval to transfer back to New Directions barring any chance that either of our groups copy the other at Regionals. I'm going back, and I'm happy about it. Coming here was more for our friendship than my terror."

Blaine was flabbergasted. He knew that Kurt wasn't afraid of Karofsky since he and Rachel became close. He also shared with Blaine why Karofsky really wanted him dead. After kissing Kurt, Blaine knew that Karofsky couldn't hurt him. Karofsky was in love. Enamored. Full of adoration. Kurt was his crush. Violence would take a backseat to the heart.

"Kurt...I don't know what to say. I don't want you to leave."

"I really will miss you Blaine. I hope you know how much you meant to me."

Blaine ran a hand through his gelled hair. He didn't know what else to say. He downed the rest of his coffee and stood up. Two steps brought him to Kurt, and he looked down at the younger boy's ivory skin.

"I guess we have one more week."

With that, Blaine left the cafe, going out to the rainy day. Kurt sat at the table, looking out to the distance, lost in thought. Blaine still meant so much to him, but in a way that was so twisted and warped by so many feelings, leaving was the only thing he could do. Rachel, Finn, and Mercedes were the only three members of New Directions that knew he was coming back. In a week, he'd be with all of the friends that made him love who he was. He knew that going back, it was the right thing to do.

Kurt knew...He knew that him and Blaine needed some time apart. Maybe then everything would make sense. The giant jumble of emotions that he had in his mind right now, Kurt hoped they'd make sense with time.

One week and he'd get away. The traditions, the politeness, the uniforms. It was all going to be behind him. He'd see Mercedes and Rachel daily. There would be so many happy memories to make. He'd miss everything at Dalton, but the last few months had seemed like a blur of being a peacock among pigeons.

He missed New Directions. He missed living. He missed his clothes.

God. He even missed the Slushies.

_**A.N. Hi guys, thanks for giving my story a try. This is chapter one of an fic that I've been considering writing for a while. I hope to get a new chapter up at least weekly. The Klaine Relationship will be explored more, along with a lot of other Kurt pairings. This is more a Kurt fic than a Klaine one. **_

_**But believe me. I ship the Hell out of Klaine. I'm sure it'll work itself out! Keep reading!**_

_**Also: Please review. They're like crack. But...healthy. C'mon. Feed me?**_


	2. Chapter 2: Song of Forgetting

**Chapter 2: Song of Forgetting**

**Monday**

By the end of classes on Monday, everyone at Dalton knew Kurt was leaving. Only Jeff seemed to be sad about it. Jeff sat at the foot of Kurt's bed, looking over at the pale boy, thinking how much he'd miss him. In the last few months, Jeff actually bonded with Kurt. They'd competed for a solo, sure, but if you live with Kurt, you begin to realize every good thing about him. Every little quirk of kindness that he exuded. He could be catty, sure, but he knew it. There was just so much _goodness_ wrapped up in Kurt. Jeff found himself loving Kurt's company. He was like the brother he never had. The relationship was close, and Kurt and Jeff both knew that

"I know you're leaving, dude, but it's going to be so hard with you gone. You were just starting to get Blaine to get off his high horse and let some of the rest of us have a bit of spotlight. Not to mention, I'm going to be bunking alone for the rest of the year. I wish I could transfer with you."

Kurt looked at his roommate. Jeff was the thing that Kurt thought he'd miss most about Dalton. They'd developed the kind of relationship that Kurt had always craved growing up. They were creatively symbiotic, and even complimented each other when not singing. Kurt knew that it'd be hard to go back to being an only child, even if his brother was only in mind, and not blood.

"Jeff, I'm going to miss you so badly, but this is just something I've gotta do. The atmosphere here has just become too...stuffy. I miss McKinley. I may have gotten slushied, bullied, and beaten, but God. I was so free. The kids there, they may have been stupid, and everyone knew that they couldn't dress to save their lives, but they were who they were, and they didn't apologize.

"There weren't any traditions to hold them back. There wasn't a baby version of a two hundred year canary sitting on their windowsills. There wasn't a trial by upperclassmen every time someone wanted to sing out. If you wanted to be in the spotlight, you just needed the talent and the balls! I love the no-bullying policy here at Dalton, but all the red-tape just takes away so much! I love being here with you, and I used to love being with Blaine. I was so enamored with the fact that I could come here and not be thrown into a locker, I was willing to not look into the repercussions of leaving New Directions.

"I loved it here so much for the first few weeks. It was like a dream. But now, Jeff? Now, it just feels like there's a giant pillow over the mouth of my creativity. I wish you could come with me too. You have no idea. But we both know how your parents would react to you picking up and saying 'Oh hey, I'm gonna go to a public school where my clothes can be whichever color I want them to be'."

Jeff looked at the boy in front of him. During his rant, he'd stood up and now was silhouetted against the rainy backdrop of his window. The canary was peeping nervously at the pale boy, and flitted from the perch to the cage's sides with an anxious air. Jeff smiled warmly and stood up next to Kurt, grabbing the boy's shoulders.

"Listen, Kurt. I know you need this. Believe me. I know. Sometimes when Wes is talking, all I can picture is various ways to render him mute. Dude, it's a giant madhouse in here. We hide behind our rules. We hide the fact that even though our vocals might be great, we lack any passion. Everyone always mocks Vocal Adrenaline for not having feeling, well, we may hide it slightly better, but our songs are so far gone, we've become adept at faking emotion.

"Our traditions hide the fact that most of our guys can barely feel anything. We can laugh and say that our order prevents us from sinking into chaos, but we know deep down we wont beat New Directions at Regionals. It's not even going to be a competition. New Directions should have won last year. I was there, so was Blaine. We were scoping out our competition for this year, and if it weren't for Vocal Adrenaline being judges favorites, you would have taken it no competition. Oral Intensity shouldn't have even stood a chance. New Directions has something that most Glee Clubs can't even hope for now a days: They have passion. So much passion, it almost hurts to watch."

Kurt smiled at his roommate and drew him into a rough hug. Jeff shook a bit, and Kurt felt a wet spot form on the shoulder of his shirt. That one tear was all that Jeff could muster. His outburst said so much, gave confirmation that he was okay with Kurt's decision. They would miss each other so much, but that was something that they both accepted. Jeff knew that Kurt needed to leave, and Kurt knew that Jeff had no choice but to stay.

All they could do now is hope to never forget.

**Tuesday**

Kurt found himself sitting alone at the cafe. He'd eschewed any contact with Blaine the day before. Other than the classes they had together, he basically had avoided the other boy the entire day. There were only three days left of classes at Dalton. The conversation he had with Jeff the night before had brought to his mind that he really would be leaving. It seemed more real that this was the last week . Every passing moment brought with it a slew of feelings he didn't know how to deal with.

Happiness: He's be seing Finn, Rachel, Mercedes, and everyone else. Every day. He'd be singing. All the time.

Sadness: Jeff would be here. Blaine would be left behind.

Fear: Karofsky.

Anger: He'd wasted so much of his time here. Hiding. Falling in love with someone that couldn't love him back. Wishing his life away.

It all confirmed his need of leaving. Kurt sat at that table, the one he shared so often with Blaine. He drank his coffee, and he thought of the life in Lima he'd ran away from. He remembered how much he missed his family. His father had been living without him during the week, and he'd been neglecting coming home on the weekends. There was so much he'd missed because of Dalton. He'd forgotten about how much he'd left behind.

Now that he was going back, he hoped that they hadn't forgotten him.

**Wednesday**

Apparently two days was too long. Blaine found him at lunch on Wednesday. He sat across from him, next to Jeff. Jeff looked over at Blaine curiously before speaking.

"Well Kurt, I'll...uh...I'll let you two talk."

With Jeff gone, Blaine stared at the younger boy, waiting for him to speak. When Kurt didn't oblige, Blaine seemed to diminish a bit, and when he spoke, it was with a softer tone that implied the fact that he was a bit afraid of the situation.

"I can't let you. I just can't. Kurt, It's changed so much since you've been here. Wes has been letting up a lot. The Warblers are becoming closer on an emotional level. You're the lynchpin. You're what's bringing us together this year. We wouldn't have even been able to make Hey, Soul Sister work if it weren't for you."

Kurt opened his mouth to protest, but Blaine kept plowing through.

"I know you didn't have the solo, but that's not what matters. The energy you bring? That's what matters. You hold us together with something that I can't describe. Please, stay. It's going to be so different without you. Not in a good way, either. I'm so bad at this, I wish I could just...Ugh. Please! Kurt, for me?"

Kurt looked up at the distraught boy in front of him. Even his appearance was coming apart at the edges. Blaine hadn't applied enough gel that morning, and the corkscrew curls that were shooting from the sides of his head made Kurt feel a weird sense of pity. But it didn't change how he felt.

"Blaine. Listen to me, this is for me. I need this. Besides, the Warblers aren't enough reason for me to stay. I never grew attached to the group like I did New Directions. It's not a family here for me, Blaine. It's just not the same. I don't have any reason to stay."

"Kurt, if not for the Warblers, stay for me. That's what I'm really trying to say. I...I don't want you to leave. I don't know what I'm going to do. It scares me how wonderful life is, now that you're in the world. I...I don't want to try to go to this school without you in it. Something has changed here. Something that I wont ever forget. Even if you leave. But...Please. Don't. For me."

Kurt's eyes found the pleading depths of the older boy's eyes. There was so much sadness there. So much longing, so many of the emotions that Kurt wished would have been there a week ago. Even just days ago. Somewhere deep down, a part of the boy still loved Blaine. But Kurt needed out. He needed a different place. A place that didn't force him to be someone, no, something he wasn't.

"Blaine. I can't. I just can't. Dalton? It's one big prison for me. I'm in a cage of perfection and traditions. Tevye didn't even impose this many rules. It's just too much. I'm on an overload. There's so much that needs to change. So many people that just wont. I need out. Home is where the heart is, and it used to be here, with you.

"But now? Now home is far, far away. My heart is too. So please, just try to forget me."

_**A.N. Phew. That was a bit of a journey. Two chapters in one night. That may be a one time deal, guys. I dunno if there'll be any more nights until after April where I can sit down and write as much as I did tonight. I know this chapter was super Angsty and emotional, but I promise it'll get lighter once this week is over. Leaving any place is really bad. There're always mixed emotions.**_

_**I promise there'll be love, happiness, and new beginnings!**_

_**Review me! I live for them.**_

_**Don't forget!**_

_**Thanks for reading.**_


	3. Chapter 3: The Guilty Ones

**Chapter 3: The Guilty Ones**

**Later that Wednesday**

It wasn't until after class on Wednesday that Wes found him. Kurt avoided the upperclassmen's eyes. There was an awkward pause before Wes seemed to find his words. When he spoke, it was with a seriousness that was different than that of ruling the Warblers. It was something different, a different graveness that Kurt had never heard before.

"Kurt, I heard you're leaving."

"You heard right."

"Listen, there's got to be some other way to get what you need, Kurt. I know you didn't get the solo. I'm sorry. If it's any consolation, I voted for you. I thought Don't Cry for Me Argentina was fantastic...I had to put up the front that you stood out because David and Thad thought and decided that it wasn't a good idea to give the new member a solo. They thought it would decrease morale. Something about showing that just because we had you didn't change the fact that we are united. I always thought you were wonderful, Kurt."

"Wes, listen. It's not your fault. I'm not leaving because of that. I'm not going because I lost out on a solo. That happened plenty at McKinley too. Rachel always beat me out for things. I'm not leaving because I don't get enough on the way of solos here. I'm leaving because I need to."

"Why, Kurt? You're actually making us start to change. We've performed in public. We've broken out of our shells. Traditions are changing, even just bit by bit. We need you. You're a creative force to be reckoned with."

"Frankly, I'm leaving because of all the traditions. They may be changing, but I'm suffocating. I can't be here anymore, Wes. I just can't."

"Is it because of Blaine?"

"Yes. But that's not all. I miss everyone in Lima. I hope every day that they miss me too. That they haven't forgotten me. I miss how free I was there. I even miss all the things I hate. I feel so guilty, every day. I left them all. Just because I was afraid. Last week, Blaine kissed Rachel. Rachel Berry, my friend. Fellow Diva. Confidante. He made me realize how much I've lost. How much I'm at fault in staying here. I need less scripting. I need less planning. I miss the highs, I miss the lows. I miss the pain. I miss the mountains that made life worth living. I ran away from my life. I regret it so much."

"Kurt, I wish I could change your mind. We'll be less with your leaving."

"I know. Everyone keeps telling me that. None of you are at fault. I should have never come here in the first place. Whatever the reasons I convinced myself with, whatever excuses I made? They were excuses of a boy that didn't know what he had. I'm just not that boy anymore, and I never will be. Maybe that makes me guilty of something, but I know what I need. I need an out."

Wes smiled. It was a sad, resigned smile. When Kurt saw it, he knew that the discussion was over with. He knew Wes understood. He didn't like it. He'd do anything to change it, but he understood that Kurt needed this. It wasn't about winning, losing, or anything else. It was about getting what you needed, and to hell with everyone else.

"Kurt, I'm gonna need your Canary back."

With that, he gave the younger boy a quick hug, and walked off to his dorm. Kurt looked down at his feet. There were so many people here that would miss him. He wasn't innocent of not hurting anyone. Every decision seemed to go badly. He was always the guilty one. He wondered if it was wrong that as much as he felt like the Warblers deserved someone better than him, he was happy that he was leaving, and no number of guilt trips could change that. He wasn't the boy that came to Dalton to run away from a bully. He wasn't the kid that was so jealous of Rachel's talent, all he could do was hate her. The only thing he was truly guilty of was growing up. Dalton had been a catalyst to his maturity. He wasn't as helpless as he thought he was.

**Thursday**

Kurt was constantly reminded that it was his last week at Dalton. The teachers knew, though they never had shown any indicator that they had either positive emotions on Kurt's leaving. There weren't any 'We'll miss you's', 'It was great having you', or other sympathies. Kurt was glad. He was sick of people needing him too much. Putting him through hell. Jeff was the only one that gave him support, really. Wes had quietly accepted his leaving. Blaine...Blaine hadn't spoken to him since lunch on Wednesday.

It was halfway through his second class on Thursday when a note appeared silently on his desk. The pale boy probably would have noticed who slipped it to him if he wasn't gazing quietly into the distance, having given up listening to the teachers this last week. It wasn't as though they'd be testing him before he left for McKinley. The schoolwork at Dalton was so much more difficult than that of his old school, Kurt wasn't worried about catching up. He would probably a few months ahead of the other idiots. It was something to be thankful for. Kurt picked up the folded square of paper on his desk and opened it slowly, making sure not to crinkle the paper loudly enough to attract the droning history teacher's attention. The handwriting was as familiar to him as the writer, and Kurt's attention focused fully onto the words.

_Kurt,_

_There's so much we need to talk about. There's absolutely no way that I can fit this into a note. We just need to talk. Please. Just once before you leave tomorrow. Right after class. Our table. The cafe._

_-Blaine_

The note was short. Simple. To the point. There wasn't anything cluing as to what would be said, so Kurt could only speculate. The bell had rung and everyone was standing up. Kurt gave a quick look around, but Blaine had already left the room. There was no sign of the boy with the curly hair anywhere. Kurt still had the note crumpled in his hand. He didn't know now if he would be going to the meeting. Blaine would try to convince him again, convince him to stay. He was always guilty of trying too hard. Or maybe not enough. Kurt supposed he just had awful timing.

When lunch rolled around, Kurt found himself sitting across from Jeff, neither of them speaking much outside of the pleasantries. There was an odd feeling in the air. Kurt would be leaving, Jeff knew it. This was the penultimate lunch they'd share together at Dalton. Kurt kept looking down at his lunch and picking at it with distaste. Jeff pushed his around food with his fork. Neither of them seemed to feel like talking that much. Kurt had filled the other boy in on his note. Jeff, ever the romantic, thought that it was Blaine's one last opportunity to make amends. It was the equivalent, according to Jeff, of showing up at the airport as Kurt was about to leave forever. Kurt just thought it was moronic, but agreed to go to the meeting, as one last favor to the guy that had lived with him throughout his Dalton experience.

After lunch, the day flew by. Kurt ended up sitting in the Dalton Library, pouring over a few books that he no longer had to study. It was just a distraction for him, he didn't actually need to study. Every moment he spent smelling the aged pages, glancing over the discolored words, it was a moment that he didn't need to think of Blaine. Every time he read the word 'and', he wasn't thinking of the boy's curls. Every vowel he sounded out in his head, it wasn't a thought of the older boy's voice, of his eyes, of his entire being. He wasn't guilty of thinking about the boy he was enamored with when he was reading, or at least that's the delusion that he told himself. Over, and over, and over again. But maybe he really was guilty of being stuck. Maybe he was guilty of falling too hard, too soon. That guilt was pushed to the side, though. Kurt knew he needed to leave.

_**A.N Sorry that this took so long, and it's so short. I'll try being longer from now on. I have no idea how that's going to go, but whatever. Haha. I've a play that I'm the lead in right now, and we've only a few weeks until Performance so I'm finding myself with less and less time to write. Anyway, next chapter, Blaine confronts Kurt with his feelings, and Kurt...Well. Kurt reacts. You'll see!**_

_**Please Review!**_

_**Keep reading!**_


	4. Chapter 4: Being Alive

Chapter Four: Being Alive

**Friday**

Kurt knew that Friday would be awkward for him. He knew it would be awkward for everyone. He was leaving, and everyone was finally hit with the fact. Within the first hour of his classes, boys he didn't even know came up to him and asked him to stay. People he didn't talk to the entire time he was at Dalton came up to him and hugged him goodbye. Everyone mourned, but nobody really cared. It was probably a tradition to mourn for every lost Warbler. Kurt took their sympathies, he took their hugs, and with each one felt a little more uneasy.

By lunchtime the entire school had said goodbye to him. The entire school other than Blaine had told him they'd miss him. Kurt walked into the cafeteria, eyes trained to the floor, books in arms. There was silence, which was unheard of. As Kurt looked up, he saw a wall of the Warblers in front of him. They stood in a row, smiling sadly. The rest of the school had formed around them, both looking to Kurt, and to the performers. Then there was a hum, and the silence broke into song.

Blaine stepped forward, his eyes sparkling as he looked at Kurt.

"Kurt, I didn't want to give you a chance to say no. The Warblers are helping me say what I need to, the only way I know how."

His voice started to join with the others as the opening chords started to ring through the cafeteria.

_The dawn is breaking,  
A light shining through.  
You're barely waking,  
And I'm tangled up in you, yeah._

_I'm open, you're closed,  
Where I follow, you'll go.  
I worry I won't see your face,  
Light up again._

Even the best fall down sometimes,  
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme.  
Out of the doubt that fills my mind,  
I somehow find you and I collide.

I'm quiet you know,  
You make a first impression.  
I've found I'm scared to know,  
I'm always on your mind.  


Blaine's eyes began to twinkle, a solitary tear dripped from his eye.

_Even the best fall down sometimes,  
Even the stars refuse to shine.  
Out of the back you fall in time,  
I somehow find you and I collide._

Don't stop here,  
I lost my place.  
I'm close behind.

Even the best fall down sometimes,  
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme.  
Out of the doubt that fills your mind,  
You finally find you and I collide.

You finally find you and I collide,  
You finally find you and I collide.

Kurt couldn't even bear to look at the older boy. His eyes dropped to the floor as everyone else began to cheer. He had seen Blaine begin to cry, and from there, he knew what was coming. He saw it a mile and a stanza away. There was no way out, and it was happening in front of the entire school. He looked up, finally, and the words came. They came like bullets, and there was no way Kurt could've avoided them._  
_"Kurt, I love you."

Silence dropped through the cafeteria again.

"Blaine, not now. Don't do this now."

"I have to. I-"

"No. We're not doing this. Not here. Not now. This is not how I wanted this. Blaine, you're embarrassing me."

Without waiting for a response, Kurt turned his body and walked out. There was so much wrong with this situation. If Blaine thought he could win Kurt back with a song and a few tears, there was more wrong with the relationship than Kurt had thought at the beginning. He didn't need someone to hold him to close, or someone to know him too well. He just wanted an equal. This manipulation was taking it too far. Blaine wasn't doing it maliciously. It wasn't that. It was just that Kurt could feel himself not resisting, and that scared him. His father was right when he told him that sometimes the Hummels had to go it alone. He didn't sing that duet with Sam, and now he wasn't going to allow Blaine to win him back with a few notes.

Kurt broke into a run. He could hear Blaine running behind him. It took all his willpower to keep him from looking back. This was a time that he had to be strong. Blaine was an even bigger threat than the bullies at McKinley. He was an emotional tumor. A loving, hard to resist, gorgeous tumor. But one that needed to be cut out of his life. At least until Kurt could figure out what he wanted.

That was the core of the issue. Kurt wanted what Blaine did. Kurt always thought that he was the most individual person he knew except for maybe Rachel. He was always himself. Out for himself. Competitive. Personal. But now his relationship with Blaine was degrading the simple individuality that he had treasured so much. There was so much of himself that he'd lost in these last few months, and McKinley, with all its bullies, it's cliché High school drama, and it's wonderful people would help him see who he really was. Not this Blaine-Pleaser that he'd become.

The front gate flew out in front of him and he walked out to the bus station. His bus wouldn't be there for another thirty minutes or so, (he silently thanked Blaine for picking one of the three times of day that the bus ran from here to Lima) but he would wait. Blaine would know better than to come for him when he was like this. Kurt grasped his bag closer to him and looked out to the park across the street. There were birds flying in the sky, and a few ducks in the pond. Spring was in the air, and it smelled so much happier outside than Kurt felt inside.

The minutes dragged on and all the young man could wonder is what Blaine was thinking. He would be crying, of course. He wouldn't understand. He didn't do anything wrong, it's just that Kurt needed the space. He needed to be the boy that Blaine fell in love with instead of the formless lump he'd become. But deep inside, beneath all the reasons _why_ Kurt told himself he needed this change, he was still heartbroken. Blaine had become as much a part of him as his stomach, or his heart. Taking Blaine out of his life caused him pain. But the pain, he convinced himself, would make him stronger. Blaine had been someone to crowd him with love, and force him to care. He was always there, as frightened as him. And yet now Kurt was alone. He forced himself not to think of alone as not alive.

"_If I can't function alone,"_ he told himself, _"then I'm not a person. I'm not a person, performer, or anything. I'm a blind, thoughtless servant. I am more than the part of a whole. I am Kurt Hummel, and I wont be defined by the man who loves me."_

The bus finally came, its silvery siding shining in the afternoon sun. Kurt stepped up the metal stairs and deposited his change in the slot. The driver nodded him on.

There were two other people riding that bus that afternoon. An old woman, her eyes focused ahead, a yellow cardigan covering her stout frame. She was smiling with a serenity that can't be achieved by anyone under the age of seventy. As if all the cares in the world had passed her by. The smile was one that implied that she had accepted her lot in life and moved on. She swayed slightly to the classical music playing from the speakers. As Kurt passed her, he couldn't help but thinking how lucky she was. She had so much acceptance in her. Her situation, her life. She could be alone without children for all he knew, and she sat there, smiling at a stranger on the bus. He envied her more than he would allow himself to admit. All he'd done the past few days was worry. Worry and think.

The second passenger was a man. He was in his late thirties, and looked to have seen better days. His suit was a bit threadbare in places, and his shoes were in need of a good polish. He looked glumly out the window, watching as the countryside passed by. Kurt thought about the humor of the other two passengers. One being obviously happy with her lot in life, the other seemed to be luckless in every venture. The lettering on his briefcase was peeling off. From what used to be RLE there now was only a bit of the R remaining. LE was still clear, if not a bit beaten. Nothing about the man screamed money, or happiness, or luck. Kurt frowned at him and took a seat to his left.

The man looked over as Kurt took his seat and gave him a nod. There was something familiar in his face and his eyes. The face shape was like a memory, but Kurt was sure he'd never met this man before. Turning away, Kurt wracked his brains. He was sure that he'd seen the man somewhere. Or at least someone that looked like him. Mentally running through the role of McKinley, Kurt came up short. He had no idea.

The bus pulled into a stop and the old woman in the yellow cardigan got out. She smiled and gave Kurt a wave as she stepped off the bus. He returned it before looking at the man. He didn't seem to be paying much attention before Kurt spoke, his voice shaky from an hour of misuse.

"Uh, sir. This is the last stop before Lima. Should you be getting off?"

Nobody went to Lima that didn't live there. There was nothing to go to. The man turned and looked surprised. He studied Kurt's face for a few moments before replying. He pulled a cigarette out from his inside pocket and opened a window. His blond hair blew up in the wind, and he gave the cigarette a light.

"No, kid. I'm going to Lima. It's where my family lives." He blew a puff of smoke out of the window and closed his eyes for a clutch of heartbeats.

"Do you have kids?" Kurt's curiosity was peaked, even if he hated the stench of cigarette smoke.

"Yeah, I've got three. Two boys and a girl. The boy's about your age. His name's Sam. Sam Evans? He goes to McKinley." The man took another drag.

Kurt's eyes lit up. The blond hair, the face. It made sense. This was Sam's dad. But why was he out by Dalton? And why was he looking so down on the dumps. Sam had said his father moved his family out here for a new job. Deciding to ask Sam when he got back to McKinley on Monday, Kurt moved the conversation onto Sam.

"Oh yeah! I know Sam." Kurt said pleasantly. Trying not to stare at the burn hole on the right breast of Mr. Evan's suit. "He's in the Glee Club. Such a great singer. Really talented. I'm sure he gets it from you."

Mr. Evans gave a non-committal grunt and threw his cigarette out the window. The bus pulled to a stop and Kurt got off, Mr. Evan's behind him. Kurt waved to him, and almost told him to tell Sam he said hello, but decided against it, knowing that Sam wouldn't want Kurt to see his dad like that. The man seemed so defeated, as if all the hope had been sucked out of the world. Maybe Sam had changed, but when Kurt left, Sam was still happy-go-lucky. Kurt wondered how he did it day in and day out. The strength it must have required.

A blackbird cawed from the front of a nearby building. Kurt took a left turn and took the well-known route back to his house. His father would still be at the shop, and Finn's mom would probably be at her work as well. The house would be to himself, and there would be silence for a few hours. The bus had given him enough silence, and all Kurt wanted to do right now was take all these feelings. The doubt, the hate, the self-loathing, the sadness, the anger, the happiness. All of them, and just pour it into a song. The auditorium would be open right now, so Kurt directed himself to McKinley instead.

The highschool seemed so quiet as he walked down the hallways. There was noone in the halls, and as he walked past the classrooms, nobody noticed him. It was almost as if he never left. The doors to the auditorium were open, as normal. Kurt climbed the familiar stairs and looked out at the empty seats. Kurt smiled, thinking about how much he'd missed this stage. How much power there was in a solo, without any backup Warblers weighing him down. He opened his mouth, and a song poured out.

When he started to sing, he began to realize that it wasn't just Blaine. It was never just Blaine.

_never dreamed of this sorrow,  
I never thought I'd have reason to lament,  
I hoped I'd never know heartbreak,  
How I wish I could change the way things went!  
I wanted nothing but goodness,  
I wanted reason to prevail,  
Not this bare emptyness.  
I wanted Days of Plenty._

But I refused to feel tragic,  
I am aching for more than pain and grief.  
There has got to be meaning,  
Most of all when a life has been so brief.  
I have got to learn something,  
How can I give her any less?  
I want life to go on.  
I want Days of Plenty

You have to Believe,  
There is reason for Hope.  
You have to Believe  
That the answers will come.  
You can't let this defeat you.  
I won't less this defeat you.  
You must fight to keep her there,  
Within you!

So Believe that she matters!  
And Believe that she always will!  
She will always be with you!  
She'll be part of the days you've yet to feel!  
She will live in your bounty!  
She will live as you carry on your life!

So carry on,  
Full of Hope,  
She'll be there,

For all your Days of Plenty.

The tears rolled down his face. He missed his mom. She'd know what to tell him.

_**A.N. Sorry this took so long, I'll try to update a lot more regularly now. I'm on summer break, and I literally have nothing to do now. Hopefully you liked the chapter. It's kind of a gateway chapter. Don't give up hope for Klaine. Don't give up on Kurt. He's going through a lot right now. I can feel it. Leave me reviews please! I live for them!**_

_**P.S. Chris Colfer signed my T-Shirt at Glee Live in Chicago! **_


	5. Chapter 5: No One is Alone

Chapter Five: No One is Alone

A shrill bell signaled the end of classes, and Kurt walked down the steps from the auditorium, his heartbeats slowing with each step. Then he heard it. Applause. A few short, but loud claps of hands. He looked around the aisles until he saw the origin. Rachel Berry stood in the back of the auditorium, a sad smile on her face. She walked up to Kurt and pulled him into a tight embrace. It felt as if all the worry, sadness, and anger that Kurt had been holding onto was draining out in her arms. Tears fell down his face as he looked at a girl he knew would never fail to be there for him. She was always on his side.

"Kurt," Rachel's eyes betrayed her worry, even if she tried to hide it with a smile, "We weren't expecting you until Monday. Why are you here so early? I thought you'd want to spend your last day at Dalton with Blaine and the Warblers."

Kurt hadn't told her about breaking it off with Blaine, or breaking off whatever there was. He hadn't told anyone about the troubles he'd been having problems at Dalton. All he said was that he was coming back to McKinley on Monday. That was all anyone needed, or so it seemed. Everyone had just been so happy that Kurt was coming back to New Directions that nobody asked questions of it. Kurt assumed that they all thought it was because Dalton was so expensive, or that Kurt missed McKinley too much. Both of those reasons were true, but neither were the heart of the problem.

"Oh Rache, I couldn't stay away from here!" He put on his best smile, and pulled her into another tight embrace. "I missed you so much. And the rest of the glee club. It's been so awful not being able to hug you every day. I've even missed the drama. Dalton was too refined for my taste. I couldn't express myself like I could here!"

Rachel's smile increased and when she responded she sounded more convinced.

"Oh, Kurt. I'm so happy you're back. It hasn't been the same without you, and I don't now if we could win Nationals without your voice. Even stars like me need help sometimes."

Kurt let out a laugh and grabbed her hand. He'd missed her friendship more than all the rest in this school. Rachel could always relate to him, no matter the situation. Whenever he was with her, he felt not so alone. They walked out of the auditorium hand in hand, and out to Rachel's car. She opened the door for him and he got in.

"I never even asked for a ride home, Rachel." Kurt said with a smile.

"Oh, Kurt. Since when do stars ask for anything? They just receive."

Rachel started the car and pulled out of the lot. There was so much to say, and Kurt didn't know how to say any of it. He looked out the window as the passed a few of the people walking home. Kurt caught a glimpse of Sam's blonde hair as they passed it. He was headed to the part of town that didn't have much on the end of residential living. There was a motel, a grocery store, and a gas station. Kurt frowned slightly at the implications and remembered his father's threadbare suit.

"Hey Rachel, don't tell anyone that I'm telling you this-"

"Of course, Kurt. I know the importance of secrets. It's in my girl-DNA."

"Well, I met Sam's dad on the way home from Dalton. He was riding the bus, and he seemed like he'd seen better days. Do you know if Sam's family's having problems or anything? He seemed pretty down."

"I wouldn't really know. Sam and I don't really talk much. I think it's an aftereffect of the Quinn-Finn relationship. All her ex-boyfriends end up hating me."

"Oh. Well, I hope that he's doing alright." Kurt ended the conversation there, but he knew he'd have to do some checking later. He wasn't one to leave well enough alone. If Sam needed help, someone had to provide it, so why not Kurt? Rachel pulled into his driveway and Kurt unloaded his luggage from the backseat. It had been a pain dragging the suitcase around from the bus stop, but Kurt was just thankful that he hadn't forgotten his clothes at Dalton. Finn pulled in the driveway next to Rachel and smiled when Kurt got out of her car. Kurt gave Rachel a kiss on the cheek and told her thanks for giving him a ride. She drove off, Barbra Streisand blaring from her vehicle.

"Hey Kurt," Finn said, his smile broadening as he pulled his stepbrother into a hug, "I've missed you. Why are you back so early, man?"

Finn was always a bit slow, but apparently he had caught on really fast to the fact that Kurt _was_ indeed home early, which signified that something _was_ wrong. Of course, it had to be that day that Finn used his brain.

"I just couldn't stay away for a few more hours, Finn!" Kurt smiled brightly and walked into the house, Finn following close behind. Even though Kurt visited every weekend, the house had stopped feeling like home without the weekday live-ins.

"Burt'll be really happy you're back, dude. He's been trying to hide how glad he is that you'll be back at McKinley ever since you said you wanted to transfer back. The house hasn't been the same without fighting you for the bathroom every morning. I still don't get what you do for that long. How long can getting ready take? You're a _dude._"

Finn still didn't understand the finer points of male hygiene. Kurt blamed his stepbrother for the particularly potent stench whenever it was Kurt's turn to do the laundry. That was one thing he didn't miss about being at home.

"Finn, I've told you many times. You don't get skin like mine just letting it go whichever way you like. I moisturize. In addition, my hair will always be seventy times softer than yours because I splurge on actual shampoo, not just cheap brands claiming to volumize."

Finn rolled his eyes and wandered over to his bedroom. Kurt took the opposite way to his, and sat down on his bed, looking around the room with a feeling of warmth growing in him. He was home. That in itself was worth every bit of happiness it provided. Seeing Rachel again, correcting Finn on his hygiene. It was all so normal. So wonderfully in character. McKinley was giving him the gift of being himself again. He didn't have Blaine tugging at his sleeve every four seconds. It was liberating. Liberating and depressing.

That night Burt hugged Kurt so tight, Finn claimed he could hear a few ribs crack. When Kurt walked through the door to the living room and Burt realized he was home, there was nothing to contain the amount of love radiating from him. Burt laughed and told Kurt that the family would be going out for dinner. Then he said the magic words:

"It's your pick, Kurt!"

Kurt could've fainted with excitement. His father knew that he had rather...expensive taste when it came to food, so it was only Kurt's 'pick' whenever there was a bit of money saved up, or on especially special occasions. Kurt guessed his homecoming counted, and he didn't want to pass up this golden opportunity. "Ginzo's, Dad!"

Burt rolled his eyes, but a big smile was plastered on his face. His boy was home, and nothing, not even going out for sushi, could ruin this wonderful night.

"We already have a reservation at eight, Kurt. I had a feeling."

Finn groaned from the couch. He was smiling too, though, when he said:

"Kurt, really? Sushi. You pick that every time you choose! What's the appeal of raw fish in sticky rice? You're hungry a half hour later, anyway!"

Carol picked that opportune moment to walk into the room and embrace Kurt. Her perfume was an instant comfort to the boy. Having a woman around the house had changed things so drastically. Little touches around the house that Kurt had been trying to implement were there in plain view, now. Flowers on the mantle, room spray permeated the room. Carol and Kurt instantly clicked.

"Hi, honey. I've missed you. We figured we'd be going to Ginzo's tonight, so we made reservations for a bunch of us. I hope you don't mind, I invited the rest of the Glee Club. We thought we'd make your homecoming dinner a bit more special than any other night. You can invite Blaine if you'd like! We know how close you guys have gotten."

The atmosphere in the room changed drastically. Burt still was a bit uncomfortable with the idea that Blaine had slept in Kurt's bed. Blaine wasn't on Burt's top ten list of people right now. Finn maintained his cluelessness. Carol stood there with the perfect smile on her face, sure she had said the magic words. Kurt gave her a big smile and hugged her really close. When he released, he took a step back to address the entire room.

"I think tonight should just be about McKinley. I've come back here, and I think we could go a few nights without introducing another character into our soap opera!"

Carol and Burt laughed, but Finn looked even more confused than normal. Kurt maintained his dramatic smile, but deep inside he knew that Finn, however unlike him it was, had figured out something was wrong. Burt laughed and made a joke about Dalton uniforms, Carol ran upstairs to change into a dress. Kurt ran upstairs to change into something that didn't smell like bus.

The car ride to the restaurant was surprisingly fantastic. 'Kurt's Choice' was kept up when it came to the music. He lead the car in a round of Your Fault. By now, Burt, Carol and Finn all knew the entire score of Into the Woods by heart. They even could harmonize. Kurt was so proud. After a few more songs they arrived at the restaurant. It wasn't especially big, but then again, it was a sushi restaurant in Ohio.

There were a few more cars in the parking lot than normal, and Kurt recognized Rachel's, among others from New Directions. Kurt was the last to get out of the car, looking around at everything. Burt, Carol and Finn were all waiting by the door when Kurt noticed Sam walking from the parking lot. His blonde hair was shining in the moonlight, but Kurt couldn't even think about that. All he noticed was the little flecks of dirt on his clothes, how worn his shoes were. Nobody without notice to clothes would even think about these things, but Kurt had become hyper-aware of everyone's appearance over the years.

"Hi, Kurt!" Sam waved as he walked closer. Kurt realized it must look like he's waiting for Sam, but all he was doing was intently studying the boy, wondering if things were as bad as he Kurt assumed they were.

"Hello, Sam. Glad you could make it! It's such a surprise to have all these people here to welcome me back! I didn't know anyone except me in this town liked Sushi!"

Sam laughed. A full, throaty laugh that showed off his considerable mouth. He grabbed Kurt by the shoulders and pulled him in for a hug. Kurt stayed stiff, not knowing what to do with the sudden contact. Kurt was acutely aware of how nice Sam smelled, despite his slightly ragged appearance. After a few breaths, Sam released Kurt.

"We don't, Kurt. We just like you! Plus we're getting back a real talent. We're happy to stomach one night of raw fish if it means we get to be around you!"

Kurt smiled and laughed. All this affection was so foreign from the reservation that was practiced at Dalton. As the family, Sam included, walked into the restaurant, they were met with a large roar. The entire Glee club, Mr. Schue, and Ms. Pillsbury had all come out for the event. A large table was filled with Kurt's favorite sushi. It was so lavish, so unexpected, so happy. Kurt broke into tears and laughter at the same time.

Rachel walked up to him and gave him a huge hug.

"We knew you'd love it, Kurt. We just knew it." She then ran away quickly and people started to filter into the back room. Kurt took this opportunity to turn to his father.

"Dad. How on _earth_ are we affording this? All that sushi had to cost as much as my Dalton Tuition." Kurt looked a bit concerned, overwhelmed, happy. It was too much. All too much.

"Don't worry about it, Kurt. Everyone in the glee club chipped in. We even got a nice group deal. Plus the chef's here know you. They gave us a great discount because...oh what was his exact words? 'That sassy little kid that has no problem telling us when our product sucks? We should give you a discount. It's not often we get someone who actually has taste buds.'"

Kurt let out a giant laugh as the glee club filtered back in the room. Rachel had a microphone. That's when Kurt knew that something was going to happen. The club lined up and Rachel had a show face on.

"Kurt. We prepared a little welcome back number for you!"

The club began to sway as Rachel let out the first few notes. Kurt instantly knew the song, and a tear started down his face.

_It's been a long time since I came around,  
It's been along time but I'm back in town,  
But this time I'm not leaving without you._

You taste like whiskey when you kiss me oh,  
I'll give up anything again to be your baby doll,  
Yeah this time I'm not leaving without you.

You said sit back down where you belong,  
In the corner of my bar with your high heels on,

Kurt had to grin at that one.

_Sit back down on the couch where we,  
Made love for the first time._

Burt raised his eyes, but Carol swatted him down and muttered something about artistic liberty.

_And you said to me:_

There's something, something about this place,  
Something about lonely nights and my lipstick on your face,  
Something something about my cool Ohio guy,  
Yeah something about,  
Baby you and I.

Been two years since I let you go,  
I could've listened to a joke for rock n roll.  
And muscle cars drove a truck right through my heart.

You taste like whiskey when you kiss me oh,  
I'll give up anything again to be your baby doll,  
Yeah this time I'm not leaving without you.

You said sit back down where you belong,  
In the corner of my bar with your high heels on,  
Sit back down on the couch where we  
Made love for the first time and you said to me,

There's something, something about this place,  
Something about lonely nights and my lipstick on your face.  
Something something about my cool Nebraska guy,

Yeah something about, baby you and I  
_You and I.  
You, you and I.  
You, you and I.  
You you and I.  
You and I.  
You you and I.  
You you and I._

You said sit back down where you belong,  
In the corner of my bar with your high heels on.  
Yeah you like the red ones,  
Sit back down on the couch where we Made love for the first time and you said to me,

There's something, something about this place,  
Something about lonely nights and my lipstick on your face.  
Something something about my cool Nebraska guy,  
Yeah something about:  
Baby you and I.

You and I.  
You and I.  
You, you and I.  
You, you and I.  
You and I.

You, you and I.  
You, you and I.  
You, you and I.

Been along time since I came around.  
Its been along time but I'm back in town.  
And this time I'm not leaving without you.

Kurt smiled and clapped. Tears were rolling down his face. He missed these people so much. He missed this feeling of belonging. He was home. For the rest of the night everyone laughed, everyone smiled. They never once complained about the sushi. Kurt ate more than anyone else, but nobody complained about being hungry.

As they were leaving, Kurt noticed Sam beginning his walk.

"Hey Sam, wait up!" Kurt raced after the blonde boy to catch up.

"We can give you a ride home, if you'd like."

"Thanks Kurt, but I'd rather walk." Sam smiled, but there was a sadness behind the smile. Kurt knew not to press his luck. "See you on Monday, man."

It was then that Kurt decided he was going to get to the bottom of Sam Evans.

_**A.N. Hey guys. Sorry it's been so long. I'm getting ready to leave for college, so it's been hectic. I'm hoping there'll be a next update soon! Please read and review! I could use some inspiration.**_


	6. Chapter 6: Brotherhood of Man

Chapter Six: Brotherhood of Man

After the sushi bar, the rest of the weekend passed in a blur of friends, family, and love. Kurt had never felt as loved as he had those last few days. The only bumps in the road were when someone mentioned Blaine, but Kurt always parried with a signature catty remark. Nobody suspected anything wrong, except for maybe Finn who got a bit awkward whenever the subject was breached. Kurt lie in bed on Sunday night, thinking about the next day when he would make his triumphant return to McKinley. At Ginzo's Mr. Schue had told him that he wanted to hear a solo out of him first thing Monday morning. Kurt was awake still, thinking about what he could possibly sing to express how happy he was to be back. When the perfect song hit him, Kurt drifted off to sleep, the dreams of McKinley at Nationals claiming all of his attention.

The alarm let out a shrill beep until Kurt swatted the sound away with a perfectly manicured hand. The clock read 5:45 am. Kurt learned early in his and Finn's brotherhood that he would have to get up early to complete his normal routine now that he was sharing his bathroom with another boy. Kurt rolled out of bed and into the shower, shedding his clothes as he went. The hot water felt so good on his skin, Kurt almost forgot to put in his conditioner. Kurt realized with that almost-forgotten routine how much he really missed this bathroom, this house, these people. It kept hitting him, how wrong Dalton was. Sure. The people were nice, the uniforms looked cute, but deep down they didn't have the same soul that McKinley did.

After extensive prepping, Kurt was finally ready to face the day. Finn was just rolling out of bed for his traditional five minute shower. By the time they were both ready, Kurt hopped in his car. Finn hopped in the driver's seat. They were even early this morning. Kurt was surprised. Finn usually avoided leaving the house any earlier than absolutely necessary. Kurt pulled out of the driveway and onto the street. Finn began to speak.

"Listen, Kurt." He sounded serious. "I want to know why you came home early. I know it's something to do with Blaine. If he hurt you or...touched you. Or anything-"

"Finn. It's nothing like that." Kurt didn't realize how much this had been bothering Finn until he said it out loud. Finn was in full-blown protective mode. Kurt was scared, honored, and repulsed all at the same time.

"Well then what is it, Kurt." Finn exhaled a bit, but was still tense. Kurt glanced out the window before answering. Talking about Blaine was _not_ the way he wanted to start his comeback.

"He. Well. He told me he loves me, Finn. At the end he got all mushy. I don't even think he meant it. He would've said anything to keep me at Dalton with him. I wasn't even as mad as I seemed about Rachel and him. It was just an excuse to leave. He heard that I was going, and I don't think before that he realized how he felt for me at all. I was just there for him to take emotional whims on. I'm done with that school, with him. I'm here Finn. I'm with you, Rache, and everyone else."

Finn finally smiled and relaxed.

"You know if you would've said anything else, I would've had to beat him up. You're my brother, and I can't have people messing with you."

"Save all that anger for Karofsky, Finn. I'm not sure he's caught wind of me coming back yet. I'll need crazy-protective-Finn then, not now. Blaine's not a threat. He hasn't even texted me since I left. He sort of had a breakdown as I was leaving. I think he's going to be gone for good."

"Karofsky wont give you any trouble. He's been lashing out since you left. He's one more strike away from being gone for good. I'll make sure that strike isn't striking you."

"Wow Finn, wordplay. I'm impressed."

Finn gave him a playful swat for that as they pulled into the school parking lot. Students were filtering into the school. Kurt noticed everyone's outfit, everyone's makeup. It was so nice to have variety. Kurt never realized how great public school was until he had to wear the same two colors day after day.

"Kurt! Happy first day back!" Rachel grabbed Kurt from behind and held him tight. "I made you a cupcake! Red Velvet, for all the carpets you're going to walk on!"

In her hand was a red velvet cupcake the size of Kurt's head. Rachel's smile was so large that Kurt could do nothing but take the cupcake from her and smile.

"Rache, I hope you know you'll have to eat this with me! Dalton's cafeteria shrunk my stomach. It can't handle all this deliciousness!"

Finn took this opportunity to go into the school. Kurt could never keep up with whether Finn loved or hated Rachel this week. It changed more often than Kurt's outfits, and that was a lot.

"I would love to, Kurt Hummel. Just so long as you know you owe me a duet. I haven't had anyone to sing with these last few weeks! I've missed harmonizing with you!." Rachel let out a laugh and grabbed Kurt's hand. "It's going to be so much better with you back, now. We really have a shot!"

"Well. With my talent, of course you do! But then again, we've always had our _real_ star." Rachel beamed. "Mike sure can hold a note."

They both burst into laughter and walked through the front doors. The hustle and bustle was so welcoming to Kurt. He missed all the difference. Hell, he even missed the hate. There was something to be said about things not killing you making you stronger. Dalton had de-calloused him, and Kurt wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not.

"Come on, Kurt. Let's get to your locker. I'm sure it's missed your decoration just as much as I've missed you." Rachel smiled and grabbed his hand, dragging him towards his old locker. The walk was so familiar, yet so alien. Like his feet remembered, but his brain didn't. Kurt smiled, half sadly, at the absurdity of not remembering the way to his old locker. When they arrived, Rachel dropped his hand and gasped.

Written across the locker in more colors than Kurt could count was the word Fag. Just written. Over. And over. And over again. Each in a different style, each in a different marker. Rachel started to apologize to Kurt, but he cut her short with a hand. Apparently Dalton hadn't removed all of his emotional armor. Or maybe it had, and Blaine just put it back up with his emotional assault over the last few days.

"Hmpf. Well. I'm surprised so many people at this school can put three letters together. I guess everyone's not as illiterate as I thought they were." Kurt let out a light laugh, disguising the sadness lurking just beneath the surface. Maybe it _was_ a bit optimistic to expect things to have changed while he was away, but he had held that fragile hope, and now it was shattered.

"What doesn't kill you, Rache, makes you stronger. Every star went through an awful stage. Just look at Kristin Chenoweth. She's from Broken Arrow, Oaklahoma. I'm sure that wasn't exactly the best place for a star to grow up, either. But Rache, she pushed through. So can I!"

Rachel pulled Kurt in for a close hug and muttered her love into his shoulder. Kurt felt the shirt start to wetly cling to his shirt.

"Rachel. Don't cry for me. It's not worth wasting the tears. If I broke down every time someone commented on my voice, on my wardrobe, on my...well. Just one me? I'd still be crying back at Dalton. This isn't the place for weakness. High School's like prison, Honey. But luckily we only serve four years."

Rachel laughed and released her hug. She gave him a smile that assured him a few more hours without being asked if he's okay, and told how stupid all of their classmates were. Sympathy would only go so far. Kurt was just thankful to be back here, with Rachel, with Finn, with...Well. With everyone.

"Kurt, have you thought about what you'll be singing for your welcome-back song? Everyone's dying to hear it, Mr. Schue told us to expect something fantastic because you're back. I must admit, you might give me a run for the title of Diva if you top my Don't Rain on my Parade performance."

Kurt smiled at the familiar back and forth. He held out a hand to Rachel and she grasped it as they walked down the hallways. A few people snickered behind Kurt's back, but even more smiled at him and told him they were happy to see him back. Kurt gave them glares and smiles, in turn. His first class back would be math, and LuPone knows that Kurt needs all the smiles he can get for that class. Thankfully Rachel would be attending with him, and she tended to take the edge off of the math problems by her uncanny knack of translating them into stage problems.

"Hey queer, I guess you didn't get enough of an asskicking last time." Aizimo sneered as Kurt walked by with Rachel. Rachel gave him a glare and stamped her foot at him. Notably it wasn't as threatening as it should have been because of Rachel's rather diminutive stature, but the dumb jock backed off. "Whatever, fag. See you in the gym." He left with a rather intimidating sneer.

"Don't worry, Kurt. He wouldn't dare. Apparently someone wrote a _rather_ threatening letter to the school board saying that if anyone gave anymore gay kids troubles at McKinley they'd have a Human Rights lawsuit handed to them." Rachel looked rather pleased with herself.

"Rachel, you didn't!" Kurt beamed.

"I didn't, no. But I may have had a few _choice_ words with my dads after you left. They were, to put it nicely, outraged." Rachel dipped a little in a makeshift curtsey. They continued into the math classroom, books under their arms.

Kurt smiled as he remembered the all too familiar smell of Mr. RuPaul's favorite cologne. It was, as always, completely overpowering everything else in the room. The teacher mumbled under his breath as the class filed in and took their seats. Kurt noticed Sam's blond mop in the back row. He and Rachel took their normal seats in the second to last row. Neither of them were especially good at math, but they didn't want to look like the idiots sitting in the back row. Kurt wondered why Sam, who usually aced his math tests, was sitting back there.

Mr. RuPaul droned on about derivatives and their limits. Kurt's mind began to wander and his eyes followed suit. Glancing around the room Kurt noticed every wardrobe choice made in every direction. Then he realized. Sam's shoes were completely worn down. The soles were barely there and there were rips in the sides of his dirty gray Converse. Sam's jeans were ripped, and not in the artistic way that Kurt saved and scrimped every penny to buy. These were worn in the knees so much that they were barely holding together in the backs. They were so close to cutoff shorts that Kurt's fashion heart just about broke.

Then Kurt realized. Maybe he wasn't the only one conscious of his fashion choices. Maybe Sam was embarrassed to be seen in such meager clothing. Pride in your appearance was something that Kurt could relate to and he instantly felt bad for Sam.

'_He must think to himself every morning that people will judge him by his outfit. He must think to himself how poor he looks, and hate every minute of it.'_

Kurt lost himself in thoughts of Sam agonizing over his wardrobe every morning. He was ripped out of his reverie when Mr. RuPaul called on him.

"So, Mr. Hummel. The derivative of this equation?" Kurt hesitated. "Mind somewhere else today, Mr. Hummel? Be sure to bring it tomorrow. A little warbler told me there might be a quiz." He winked at Kurt as the bell rang, releasing the class. Mr. RuPaul had always liked Kurt, even though he never succeeded in his class. It was common-knowledge that Mr. RuPaul had been a member of the Glee Club the same year that Mr. Schuester had gone to, and won, Nationals. People whined and complained that he favored the music students, but deep down Kurt knew that they were just angry that a teacher besides Mr. Schuester treated them like human beings.

"Kurt, I've got to go to Spanish! Have fun in French!" Rachel laid a small peck on Kurt's cheek and rushed off to her next class. Kurt wandered into his next class, mind still on Mr. RuPaul's wink and Sam's gray Converse.

The next thing Kurt felt was a jolt of pain in his shoulder followed by two thuds on his feet. Kurt didn't even have a chance to react before he saw Karofsky walk away, laughing.

"Sorry, didn't see you there fag. All the sequins blinded me.

Kurt couldn't even must a sneer. He just picked up his books and walked into the French room, shoulder burning. He took his normal seat and sighed before looking up. Standing before him was what only could be described as the best person that could ever appear. Holly Holiday was dressed in full Marie Antoinette regalia, a huge smile on her face.

"Bonjour!" She gestured around to the rest of the class, her eyes still on Kurt, smile getting wider by the second. "Today I'll be taking over for Mademoiselle Houx." She put up a conspiratorial hand and stage whispered to the class. "She caught the clap."

Kurt grinned and let out a light snicker at Ms. Holiday. She would be the perfect antidote to the Dalton drabness. Nothing was more exciting than an eccentric substitute in a gown and powdered wig. Well. Maybe a mystery involving gray shoes and a beaten suitcase, but that could wait until later. Kurt was sure about that.

"Today, class, we will be talking about Marie Antoinette. She was this hot babe in the eighteenth century. Married to a king, rich, powerful, beautiful. You could say she pretty much had it all. But people's opinions of her had _way_ too much of an impact, and eventually she lost her head. Literally. So. Let's talk about how when you have an opinion about someone, how that might affect them. Kurtsy, babe. Let's hear from you first."

Kurt was flustered and dropped his mechanical pencil on the desk.

"C'mon, honey. Let's hear from you, you feisty little croissant."

"Well, um...I suppose it's like when people constantly tell you they hate your favorite pair of shoes. You can only stand so much teasing before you just call it quits and get rid of the offense."

"Very good, Kurt. Now let's apply that to Marie. She was Queen of France, babes. That means she had power over one of the most powerful countries. Unfortunately people at that time were _really_ down. There was a whole riot about how the lower class was being systematically put down and the upper class was just their to enjoy their troubles. Some say Marie was one of those upper class people, enjoying all the cake she could eat without busting out of her corset and not working for any of it. But c'mon people! Cutting off her head? Completely un-called for!"

Kurt giggled and started to take notes as the substitute went on about the causes of the French Revolution and how it all worked out. The bell rang as Ms. Holiday stood up from the stool she had been leaning on and announced:

"Let's get some tacos!"

The class laughed and took the pieces of cake that Ms. Holiday was handing out as they left. Kurt abstained. He knew the dye in the frosting would dye his mouth black, but he would enjoy everyone else walking around with the affliction all day. Ms. Holiday gave him a big wink as he left and clapped him on the back.

"Hey kid, don't let those bourgeois idiots get them down, okay? Don't be a drag, just be a Queen!" She gave him a dramatic curtsie as he made his way into the hallway. Kurt missed her crazy. It was definitely a change from the rather gray sounding teachers at Dalton.

"Kurt! How was French? I heard Ms. Holiday subed! That must have been great, your first day back!" Rachel grabbed Kurt's arm as they walked down the hallway. They had their next class, gym, together. Kurt dreaded going to gym every day, and had put it off until this year to take the required credits. It involved the most uncomfortable experience of every gay male's life: The Locker Room. Contrary to popular belief, gay kids, or mabye it was just Kurt, hated the Locker Room. It wasn't a free buffet of glances at classmate's half-naked bodies. It was a disgusting room filled with odours that offended Kurt's nose, people that offended his eyes, and most of all the constant threat of men beating his face in for simply glancing in the wrong part of the room. It's not like they were even attractive.

"Well Kurt, I've got to go change. Hurry up and meet me back out here. We'll avoid Karofsky, don't worry." Rachel tried to keep the doubt out of her voice, but she wasn't that good of an actress quite yet.

The first few steps in are always the worst. The smell affronts the nose even before the sounds of men reach the ears. Kurt quickly opened his locker and pulled off his shirt, replacing it with the red workout shirt. He was halfway out of his tight, red pants before he noticed Karofsky walking over. Kurt's stomach dropped and he fought back a tear.

"So fag, like what you see?" This was always how it started. Kurt ripped off his pants, barely careing that there would be a wet spot right above the knee. He pulled on his short and raced out of the room before Karofsky could even get a word out, let alone a punch. Stars had to be great at The Quick Change. It was a nessecary tool, one Kurt had learned quicky to avoid making bad situations worse.

"Everything okay, Kurt? You didn't get hurt, did you?" Rachel wasn't even pretending not to be worried anymore and the look on Kurt's face must have worried her even more because she started to hum and shift her feet. It was easy to know when Rachel was upset. She may not say anything, but everything about her body said so.

"Don't worry Rachel. No violence. Let's just get done with class."

Today was an ultimate frisbee day and Kurt had never been more thankful for a low-contact sport. The class passed without incident under the eyes of Coach Beiste. Kurt was first in and out of the locker room. Karofsky barely had time to shove him on his way out.

"Let's go, Rachel. It's lunch, then Glee. I've got to get in the zone for my performance!" He gave his best smile of bravado and Rachel seemed convinced.

They dined on salads that Rachel had packed in celebration of Kurt's homecoming. One was labeled Non-Vegan. Kurt rolled his eyes but smiled at his friend for remembering that he liked salmon with his salad. Rachel was a great cook, apparently, and the homemade dressing was absolutely delicious. They made small talk and Kurt told her all about how McKinley was better than Dalton. She seemed happier because of that.

"I'll see you in the auditorium. I can't wait Kurt. You're something special, and this will be a performance that New Directions will never forget!"

Kurt smiled as Rachel walked away. Kurt had decided not to change into any costume. Today would just be about him. The song was going to be hard enough to belt without bursting into tears. He didn't need to be someone else today. He had his own problems and wanted to get them out as himself, the only way he knew how: Singing.

Kurt entered through the back door of the auditiorium. The stage lights were lit, the band in their places. Kurt stepped into the middle of the stage, looking out into the audience. Everyone from the Glee Club was there. Kurt felt a rush of emotion as he looked out on Rachel smiling at him, encouraging him silently. How had they ever been enemies?

But then Kurt saw him. Sam was sitting over in the corner, not surrounded by anyone. He didn't seemed concerned by his solitarity, and stared at Kurt, all attention focused on the point where the young man stood. The spotlight closed on Kurt, only showing him, the stage completely darkend behind him.

The pianist played the first few dropping notes and Kurt began to sing, his voice filling the room:

_We need some light._

_First of all, we need some light._

_You can't sit here in the dark._

The lights came up around the stage, Kurt singing, his eyes starting to wet themselves.

_And all alone, it's a sorry sight._

_It's just you and me._

_We'll live, you'll see._

_Night after night,_

_We'd sit and wait for the morning light._

_But we've waited far too long,_

_For all that's wrong to be made right._

_Day after day,_

_Wishing all our cares away._

Sam's eyes started to glisten. The lights moved across the audience, highlighting each of them.

_Trying to fight the things we feel,_

_But some hurts never heal._

_Some ghost are never gone,_

_But we go on,_

_We still go on._

_And you find some way to survive_

_And you find out you don't have to be happy at all,_

_To be happier alive._

Rachel started to cry, her face shining with sadness.

_Day after day,_

_Give me clouds, and rain and gray._

_Give me pain, if that's what's real._

Sam was the second to cry. His tears were so unexpected, Kurt lost it as he kept singing.

_It's the price we pay to feel._

_The price of love is loss,_

_But still we pay._

_We love anyway._

_And when the night has finally gone._

_And when we see the new day dawn._

_We'll wonder how we wandered for so long, so blind._

_The wasted world we thought we knew,_

_The light will make it look brand new._

_So:_

_Let it-_

_Let it-_

_Let it-_

_Let it-_

_Let it-_

_Shine, shine, shine._

Kurt's tears stopped and he held his hands out, raising them to the people in front of him, supporting him, loving him.

_Day after day,_

_We'll find the will to find our way._

_Knowing that the darkest skies will someday see the sun._

_When our long night is done,_

_There will be light._

_There will be light._

_When we open up our light._

_Sons and daughters, husbands, wives._

_Can fight that fight._

_There will be light._

_There will be light._

_There will be light._

_There will be light._

The entire Glee Club stood up, tears running down each one of their faces, their applause filled the auditorium. Kurt was home. There was Light.

_**Author's Note: I thought you guys deserved a quick update for being so patient with me. I'm sorry that things have been so hectic around here. I just got a MacBook Pro (My new baby!) and it's a lot easier to write and get stuff done on this thing! So hopefully this quick update thing will become a norm. Once every week or two. At the least. Anyway. Thank you so much for staying with Kurt, and for staying with the story. I realize the implied Kum might be a bit too much for some people, but believe me, there's so much more to come for Kurt. Don't lose hope for Klaine, or any other ship. At this point, Kurt's writing himself. I'm just a vessel. Who knows what'll happen. **_

_**But anyway, I'm rambling. I'd like to give a shoutout to my avid reviewer, TheFutureMrKarofsky. Believe me, your soon to be hubby will be in the next few chapters heavily. **_

_**Please keep reading, everyone. And for the sake of the gods, please review! A few words can inspire an author so much. I wrote most of this chapter under the steam of the review that TFMK gave me. **_

_**Stay excellent. I love you, with all my heart, I love you!**_


	7. Chapter 7: What You Want

Chapter Seven: What You Want

New Directions swarmed the stage and put their arms around their returned member. Kurt felt the warmth of his friends travel through him. They hadn't forgotten him and there was nothing that could've made Kurt feel happier. The bell rang signaling the next class of the day. It was Kurt's last class, Study Hall. Rachel scurried off to her last class, leaving Kurt standing outside of the classroom. As he grabbed his bag off the floor Kurt looked both ways, making sure Karofsky was nowhere to be seen.

Kurt sat at his normal seat, thankful nobody had taken it. The teacher, a stocky bald man named Mr. Garvey, sat at his desk, face in hand. Study hall was more of a babysitting class than anything having to do with teaching. From Kurt's seat in the back corner he could observe everyone in the room. For him, Study Hall was mostly spent daydreaming about leaving McKinley, or planning a new solo. Today was the first day that Kurt spent it thinking about Sam Evans.

'_Well obviously the family is having problems. I just wish he would talk to Glee about it. We're the ones that would support him through anything. We could help him if he only asked. But I suppose I shouldn't be the one judging about an over-active pride. Blaine's probably sitting in his dorm crying because I couldn't let myself be any less than what I am.'_

"Hey, Kurt." Kurt looked up. A boy of around seventeen stood in front of him, smiling nervously. "Mind if I sit here?"

"Careful, you might catch a slushie if you're seen with me." Kurt said dryly, but motioned to the chair across from him. Kurt knew the face vaugely but never knew the kid's name. Then again, he was mostly invisible to the student population unless they were mocking him, so Kurt didn't tend to pay attention to the other students at McKinley unless they were in New Directions or making his life a living hell.

"Hi. I'm Kyle. We, uh, we have French together." He bit at his fingernails after he stopped talking, his head slightly down as if to avoid Kurt's gaze. There was an awkward moment of silence while Kurt considered the boy in front of him. It wasn't like there were any negative memories of Kyle, but Kurt just found it odd that someone he'd never spoken to had sought him out in the one class that he didn't have a member of New Directions to protect him.

"Uh, yes. Yes we do, Kyle. Is there something I could help you with?" Kurt raised a curious eyebrow at the boy in front of him, all the while studying his appearance. V-Necked gray shirt, probably from a clothing store in town, boot-cut jeans, Converse. He could've been any kid in the crowd.

Kyle looked a little nervous. He opened his mouth, then quickly closed it again.

"I just wanted to say welcome-back, I guess."

He pulled out a book from the bag to his left and started to read. Kurt glanced at the title: _The Perks of Being a Wallflower_. Kurt almost forgot to hold back his vocal disapproval and let the conversation go away with a quick sneer. That, after Harry Potter, had been one of Blaine's favorite books.

The rest of the class went by in a quiet hour spent looking over a fashion magazine that Kurt had brought to entertain him. Flipping through the pages, admiring the, oh how would Blaine put it? _Totally awesome_, outfits that occupied the photographs. Losing himself in this season's fashion, Kurt began to reflect on how much Dalton had made him change. First he'd lost a bit of the steel that made him a real person instead of just a mindless Warbler. Now? Well, now he was so much stronger than he'd ever been, even if there were still flaws in his steely shield.

The bell rang and Kurt hurried over to his locker. There was a sad sort of haze hanging in his gaze. Today had been a nearly perfect day and now it was over. Kurt grabbed his things from his locker and put them neatly into his shoulder bag. As he closed his locker door, Kurt glanced over to his left. There was Kyle, grabbing things from his locker and stealing glances at Kurt. The ex-Warbler stared for a while until he caught Kyle's eye. A raised eyebrow said more than any words ever could. Kyle quickly grabbed his things and bolted. Kurt raised both eyebrows now, more in surprise than the questioning gaze he gave only moments before.

_I don't understand why he's taken such a sudden interest in me. Maybe one of the football players is paying him to gain my trust, then at the right moment slushie me? It seems far too well thought out to be a Karofsky plan. Whatever, it's probably just another kid trying to get at the freak show that is my life._

Kurt walked out to his car and saw that Finn was already waiting by it. Kurt unlocked the doors and Finn climbed in. He had that awful Finn-ish look on his face that meant that Kurt was going to have to endure another round of questioning. Kurt got in the car and turned the key. They were a few blocks down the street before Finn started up again.

"That song was really great, Kurt."

Kurt was completely caught off guard from the compliment.

"Thanks, Finn. It was...appropriate. In more ways than one."

Finn shifted a big uncomfortably. He looked out the window before speaking. "It was really amazing, bro. It blew me away. I've always wondered...how do you do it?"

"Do what, Finn?"

"Sing like that. You make it sound like every note is unique and meaningful. Whatever you sing is perfectly...clear. It's always so special to hear you sing. You make it so that everyone in the room is completely with you. In that space where you're singing. You make everyone laugh with you, cry with you. It's amazing"

Kurt was stunned. First that Finn was eloquent enough to put that compliment together in his head, and second because he actually said it out loud. "I had no idea you felt that way, Finn. I don't know how I do it. I just sing. I pick songs that mean something to me. To sing something it has to be perfect for me. Sure you can pick up any old piece of sheet music and sing it, but to really perform, Finn? A song has to mean so much to you that you _have_ to sing it. It has to come from somewhere deep inside you where you put all of you sadness, fear, and anger. It has to mean so much that if you don't sing it, it'll fester in you until you let it out."

Finn sat dumbstruck. He opened and closed his mouth several times before finding the words he wanted to say.

"Wow, Kurt. That's beautiful. Will...will you help me pick a song for this weeks Glee assignment?"

"I would love to. What's the assignment? I was too busy basking in everyone's applause to notice anything Mr. Schue said." Kurt smiled at Finn. It wasn't like his step-brother to ask for help.

"Really? I figured that when people talked about you, you listened. This week's assignment is to pick a song that told the group how we felt about you."

Kurt sat, dumbstruck. The implications of hearing, through song, what everyone thought of him was astounding. He'd obviously completed the week's with Light, but now it was everyone else's turn to say how they felt about him being back, and how they felt about him in general.

"Uh, Finn. I don't know how much help I can be with picking a song if it's about me."

Finn gave him a dumb look, completely a throwback to the cluelessness that Kurt was used to. Kurt shook his head and started to answer the implied question.

"Think about it, Finn. If you're supposed to talk about how you feel about me, and I pick the song? That wont be about your feelings at all. It'll be how I want you to feel about me being back."

Finn looked a little let down, but nodded in agreement.

"I'll make it really great for you, Kurt. You deserve it."

They pulled into their driveway and got out of the car. Finn grabbed Kurt's bag and took it inside in a rare show of brotherly love. Kurt locked his car and was walking inside as he heard his cellphone go off. The ringtone was _Baby, It's Cold Outside_ and Kurt let out an audible sigh. An entire weekend went by without Blaine texting him, and Kurt had been hoping for that to be the end of having to worry about the older boy from Dalton. Kurt opened his phone and read the text. It was three words long, but there was so much to be said from them:

**I miss us. -Blaine**

Most of Kurt wanted to delete the message. Most of him wanted to delete Blaine's number forever, block it and never answer his texts, or calls, again. But somewhere deep inside Kurt there was still a bit of that boy who fell in love with Blaine. There was still a little ember that kept the _cold outside_ away. Kurt wanted to just count it as a bad couple of months and forget, but that little ember wanted him to remember forever, to get Blaine back, to love him again. There wasn't any way Kurt could extinguish that little bit of warmth. But he could fight it.

Kurt shoved his phone back into his jeans and walked into the house. He told Burt hi, and assured him that yes, his first day back was everything he could ever dream of. He thanked Carol for the bottle of sparkling apple cider she gave him as a welcome-back present. Yes, it was his favorite, yes he was absolutely thrilled.

And yet through all of it there was a nagging part of him that wanted to bring out his phone and answer Blaine's text. That little ember inside of him just wanted to pull the phone out and tell Blaine that he hated him, or that he loved him. That little part kept debating over which.

After dinner (Stromboli and sweet potatoes, one of Carol's many specialties), Kurt went up to his room and popped in his copy of RENT: The Final Broadway Performance and laid in bed. Halfway through _I'll Cover You_ there was a knock on the door. Kurt said, in a tired voice:

"Come in."

In walked Finn, arms crossed, with a sheepish expression on his face. Kurt motioned to the bed as a welcoming gesture for Finn to sit down, but Finn just stood awkwardly in the doorway, closing the door behind him as he entered.

"Hey Kurt, I wanted to ask you about something."

"Finn, I really can't help you with the Glee assignment. I'm sorry, but it's not fair to you or me if I help you pick it."

"No, dude. It's not that. It's just..." Finn's voice trailed off.

"Well, out with it, then." Kurt was a bit harsher than he should have been, and immediately regreted it. Finn had been nothing but nice. Kurt quicky added a smile and Finn relaxed a bit.

"I was thinking. I really missed you when you were gone." Kurt blushed a bit before Finn continued. "I wanted to get you something as a welcome back present."

"Finn, that's really sweet, but completely unnessecary. I have everything I could ever want right here. You've been a wonderful step-brother. I thank you for that, but seriously, a gift is far too much. Rachel got me a cupcake and that was too much. I'm just happy to be home. To be back with New Directions."

Finn was waiting patiently for Kurt to stop, but made no movement to interrupt. When Kurt finally stopped speaking, Finn smiled his big, goofy smile.

"Kurt. I already got you something. I didn't check with you beforehand because I knew that you'd expect nothing. I just wanted to show that I really do like having you back, man."

Finn opened the door and grabbed something that was directly outside the door. Finn held a box with holes in the sides. There was a bow on top with a tag that was simply labeled: **For Kurt**. Finn handed the box to his stepbrother and Kurt shook his head in disbelief at his brother's thoughtfullness.

Kurt opened the box and looked inside. There was an audible gasp followed by an equally audible scratching sound. In the box was a kitten barely the size of Kurt's hand. It was gray all over except the top left part of its face.

"Oh my god, Finn. How did you know?" Kurt had been begging Burt to get a kitten for years but Burt kept putting it off, saying that the timing wasn't right, they couldn't afford one. Kurt eventually stopped asking, but he never stopped wanting.

"Burt said that you'd always wanted one. I figured now was as good a time as any, dude. She doesn't have a name yet. I figured you'd want the honor."

"Finn. I don't know how to thank you enough. This means more to me than you can even imagine. My...my mom loved cats. She always wanted one, Dad said, but she was allergic. He said she used to keep a calender with kittens on every month and mark off every day. Dad said she used to go to their friend's house and visit the cats dispite the fact that she'd come home with a stuffy nose and itchy eyes. She loved cats so much, but she couldn't have one. Now the house can finally have what it was missing all those years ago."

By the end of his speech Kurt's eyes were filled with tears and his hands were shaking a bit. The kitten mew'd from inside her box, prompting Kurt to pick her up and set her beside him.

"I never knew, dude. I just...thought you liked cats. Burt didn't say...Well. I'm happy. I'm glad I could do something for you."

Finn started to turn and leave when Kurt lept of from the bed and threw his arms around the tall boy. The kitten mewed from the bed and Kurt squeezed his stepbrother. Kurt put a lot of unsaid feelings into that hug and was glad that Finn couldn't read minds.

"Thank you so much."

"Anytime."

Finn left and Kurt sat back on his bed, looking at his gray and white lump of fur. He nuzzed her head with his closed fist and scratched under her chin with his free hand. The kitten began to purr and roll all over Kurt's bedspread.

"What's your name, sweetheart?"

The cat looked up at him with its blue eyes and blinked. Kurt smiled. He didn't believe in ghosts, or heaven, or angels. But Kurt knew the cat's name. He looked into those big blue eyes and picked the cat up, bringing her to eye-level.

"You're name's Amelie. My mom always wanted a kitten like you, and now you've got her name. She'd be happy, and I expect you to be a good cat, just like she'd have wanted. Use your litterbox, don't shed everywhere, especially on my clothes. Keep out from under Burt's boots. He's a bit clumsy and might step on you. He'll love you, though, even if he's not used to saying your name."

The kitten looked up at Kurt for a while. She wove herself between his arms and plopped into his lap. She sat there for a while and purred. Kurt pressed play on his DVD player and turned off the lights. He began to doze off a little. There were those few passing moments of almost-asleep before Kurt was jerked back awake by the sound of _Baby, It's Cold Outside._ Amelie was lying next to Kurt's head on the pillow, and she began to stretch her little paws as he bolted upright to grab his phone. The film had ended a while ago and Kurt switched off the television before looking at his phone. The clock read 1:17 AM in bright blue letters.

**I don't like Dalton without you. -Blaine**

Kurt looked at his phone in disgust and tossed it across the room. He pulled Amelie in close to him and rubbed his cheek against her soft coat. She was filled with warmth. Kurt felt a strange sense of comfort in that tiny body. It was as if nothing could touch him now that Amelie was there. Kurt knew it was stupid to get attached to a kitten that had only shared his bed for a few hours, but there was something about knowing that his mom would've loved it. It was like being closer to her. It was like hugging Amelie was the same as curling up next to his mother's dresser and smelling her perfume. It was like a wave from beyond a veil. It almost made up for every time he'd ever had to answer the phone with, "No, she's dead, this is her son."

Amelie purred. Kurt smiled at the kitten and got out of bed, leaving her to sleep. He'd fallen asleep much to early, and now the night was just calling him, he grabbed his phone and left his room walking quietly down the hallway. Kurt walked down to the basement, passing Finn's door and making sure not to wake him up. He opened the door to the room that Burt had soundproofed especially for Kurt's use.

Kurt looked down at his phone and shook his head. A sad, longing feeling filled him. Kurt might be completely done with Dalton. He might really hate what Blaine was doing to him. He might even hate the fact that Blaine thought of him at nearly two am. But that stupid, stubborn little ember inside of him wanted to text him, to talk to him, to hold him in his arms again. Kurt looked at the wall to wall mirror in his dance room. He walked over to the piano. His pale fingers touched the keys, bringing out a sad, slow song. Kurt opened his mouth and poured his sadness, his longing into song.

_Your fingertips across my skin,_

_The palm trees swaying in the wind, images,_

_You sang me Spanish lullabies._

_The sweetest sadness in your eyes, clever trick._

_Well, I'd never want to see you unhappy._

_I thought you'd want the same for me._

_Goodbye, my almost lover,_

_Goodbye, my hopeless dream,_

_I'm trying not to think about you,_

_Can't you just let me be?_

_So long, my luckless romance,_

_My back is turned on you._

_Should've known you'd bring me heartache,_

_Almost lovers always do._

_We walked along a crowded street,_

_You took my hand and danced with me in the shade,_

_And when you left you kissed my lips,_

_You told me you would never ever forget these images, no._

_Well, I'd never want to see you unhappy,_

_I thought you'd want the same for me._

_Goodbye, my almost lover,_

_Goodbye, my hopeless dream._

_I'm trying not to think about you,_

_Can't you just let me be?_

_So long, my luckless romance,_

_My back is turned on you._

_Should've known you'd bring me heartache,_

_Almost lovers always do._

_I cannot go to the ocean,_

_I cannot try the streets at night,_

_I cannot wake up in the morning,_

_Without you on my mind._

_So you're gone and I'm haunted,_

_And I bet you are just fine._

_Did I make it that easy to walk,_

_Right in and out of my life?_

_Goodbye, my almost lover,_

_Goodbye, my hopeless dream._

_I'm trying not to think about you,_

_Why can't you just let me be?_

_So long, my luckless romance,_

_My back is turned on you._

_Should've known you'd bring me heartache,_

_Almost lovers always do._

The last note finished with a long, wavering note. A single tear fell down Kurt's face. He looked up from the paino and into the mirror. Kurt closed the piano and closed the curtains letting in the moonlight and streetlamps. Darkness hit the room, and Kurt walked back up to bed. Amelie cuddled up close to him, and Kurt let his waking dreams take him.

_**A/N Hi, Guys. I'm happy to say it hasn't been a rediculous amount of time since I updated last. I really hope you like this chapter because some of the bits are my favourite that I've written so far. Same as always, please review! It means so much to me to hear anything from anyone! Even if it's negative. **_

_**Chris Colfer. That's all. I love him. Haha.**_


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